Of course, my sister, I hugged. She still sees me as a little kid.As soon as we sit down, Dahlia brings out the letter and is about to open it when I stopped her, saying, “You can’t open it here. I can’t let my uncle see. It is a big enough risk showing you three. We will go for a drive after breakfast and park on top of Mt Tolmie. Then we will talk about it in the privacy of the car.” None of the girls were happy about that.Rachel didn’t know about the letter and was confused when Dahlia brought it up. She suddenly had a bunch of questions, “What is the letter about, and why did you make me get up early on a Saturday? Better yet, why are the girls pissed that you are making them wait?”I admit, “Since we first met, I have kept a secret from you. I couldn’t tell you because there was no way you would believe me. I am sick of never having anybody to talk to about it, so in the envelope is proof. Hopefully, it is enough that you will believe me.”I switched the topic, and they were kind. The hurt and anger I had bottled up inside was something I did not know how to express. Perhaps it was because I was never really taught how. Or maybe it was some subconscious wishful thinking on my part that no one would ever find out the level of hurt and shame I was carrying deep inside. Imagine me, the kid who once reveled in the spotlight as a star high-school athlete, avoiding other people like the plague. It was a part of me I never knew. A part of me I wished I never had to meet. Not long after Debbie and I parted ways, I moved into a fairly modest bachelor pad in a small city across the border in New Jersey. I told myself I should make an effort to get back into the dating scene and I thought moving to a more urban area might be a plus. Or maybe in the back of my mind I had hoped I’d somehow be able to lose myself amongst the crowds. One thing I did do was to put myself more into my work. This seemed to afford me a certain amount of solace. An old friend of mine from my high.
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